literature

Family of love

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Christianonfire7's avatar
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Literature Text


Your life is a precious book,
With each page delicately turned.
To open chapters of your memories;
For all to read.
The crimson of these poinsettias-
Pave the color of your soul, of your mind.
The fragrance of lilies fills your eyes.

We see the love and loneliness buried within,
By the absence of your one and only husband.
We notice the loyalty you still carry for him.
By never seeking the comfort of another lover.
You bare the ache so well, and we admire-
Just how strong you stand to be.

To think, your life, your very existence birthed so much.
Without you so many lives would've never been.
My mother, my brothers, my sisters and aunts.
My nieces and my nephews all live because of you.
Because of that burning fire of love shared decades ago.
Between one man, and one woman.

So when you reflect upon your life,
Know you are very special to us all.
For you, guided by God's hand-
-helped create this family of love.

Day 27 of the National Poetry Writing Month.

Me reading this poem


My grandmother's 90th birthday was Wednesday (the 25) and she's asked my siblings/mother etc to come over for a little while tomorrow for a party. She hasn't been doing so well health wise so every chance she gets seeing the grandkids she enjoys.
Though she's the only grandparent I've ever really known I've never been all that close to her (being the youngest of her grandkids and all) but she's always known what I've liked, she use to give my cat towels/blankets/shirts etc for my birthdays and christmases. (which I've always loved) The most special of all gifts (and one of few things I've had with me every day for the past two years being homeless) is a ring with diamonds and sapphires on it, which is hers and my grandfather's birthstones (which she gave to me for my 16th birthday) and two necklaces with diamonds on it in the shape of a circle (which she gave to me for my 18th birthday) of all gifts I've been given (next to Gideon of course) those are the most precious to me. And no matter what I'll always keep them.

So a few days ago before her birthday I was inspired to write something for her, something that would be special (hopefully) to her as a birthday gift. I've had no idea how to write the piece so I've held off on it until today, which it was hard writing but I kinda feel it came out somewhat nice. :shrug:
It's the least I can do for her after her lifetime of raising a family. :)

My grandfather died of cancer way before I was born, at least six/seven years I think before I was born. So I never got to meet him, but I've been told he was an amazing father and husband. My grandmother loved him so much that after he died she never even considered marrying again, never even looked at another man after him. Because no one could ever amount to him. She loved him that much.
It's admiring. :nod:

Any critiques would be welcomed, anyway I can fix it before I give it to her tomorrow... would be helpful.


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Jazzerscissor's avatar
:star::star::star::star: Overall
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Vision
:star::star::star::star::star-empty: Originality
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Technique
:star::star::star::star::star-half: Impact

I think it's very well done, although if I were you I would eliminate the line "Between my grandfather and grandmother" completely. It's understood perfectly without it through the preceding lines, so it's unnecessary. Also, if you felt so inclined, saying "your life is a precious book" would work better in my opinion since it draws the reader in, as though they're experienceing it, rather than simply watching it happen. Other than that, I think it's great! <img src="e.deviantart.net/emoticons/s/s…" width="15" height="15" alt=":)" title=":) (Smile)"/> I don't have anything else to add, but i couldn't find the comment section and I needed 23 more words so ignore this part, ha (I'm not too experienced on here yet).